Sunset Mass, Saturday/6.00pm.
St. Joseph Cathedral, Kuching

I really love to share what I saw and what I have experienced:

Yesterday, I went to St. Joseph Cathedral for Sunset Mass , I saw this pity teenage boy. What made me feel sad was that, he's kinda mentally retarded or maybe he has some kind of disability. First, I didn't notice he was there, sitting just a few steps from me and my roommate. Back then, I just thought that he was just like many ordinary people praying there. After that, I noticed that he was special, he sang out song loudly, with spirit and big smile painted on his face. I feel like seeing my younger brother in him. I suddenly felt this kind of feeling; sad, confused, touched, sort of. Why do this world is so cruel? Why are there people still need to suffer?

I still remember this line that he sang very loud: By the time I called Your name, You answered me Oh God!

I felt tears washed up eyes, I couldn't help myself that I cried. How great is his love to the Lord. I can't describe in detail my feeling that time. I was just so touched by his love towards God. You know what, he was sitting there by himself. Nobody sat beside him. When the Father asked us to give the sign of peace to each other, he even came to us first! He gave out his hand, hoping for us to receive his sign of peace. He smiled. I feel like I want to hug him and give thanks to him for making me realized my mistake. He was so beautiful in my eyes and YES of course, he is the most beautiful person in God's eyes. He deserved God's love and blessing. Oh God, how shameful it is for me. I have everything but still I'm not being grateful to God. I didn't give thanks to Him everyday. But what does this guy do? He smiled happily in God's house: the church. God, I feel embarrassed by him!

Still, I cannot forget him until now. I wish my love for God is as great as his. Lord, please bless him. Forgive me Lord. I feel sorry for myself. I hope of seeing him again. I want to learn from him how to love you oh Lord.

Tuhan Yesus Kristus, aku menyedari bahawa aku seorang berdosa yang tidak dapat menyelamatkan diriku sendiri. Aku memerlukan Engkau. Aku mengakui bahawa aku telah berdosa terhadap Engkau. Saat ini aku minta agar darah-Mu menghapuskan segala kesalahanku. Hari ini aku mengundang Engkau, mari masuk ke dalam hatiku. Aku menerima Engkau sebagai Tuhan dan Juruselamat satu-satunya di dalam hidupku. Aku percaya bahawa Engkau Yesus adalah Tuhan yang telah mati dan bangkit unutk menyelamatkan dan memulihkanku. Terima kasih Tuhan, di dalam nama Tuhan Yesus Kristus aku berdoa. Amen!

Date: 16/07/2010
Time: 11.30pm
Place: Bilik Tayangan IPG KTAR

TCF Gathering

I feel like sharing this little true story, told by Madam Christina during our TCF gathering today. I was touched by this story that how much God really understand our needs, He knows our lacking and He fulfill our needs to the best that He can give us. Madam Christina herself experienced this. Here is the story;
Thirty-two years in the past, I was married to my husband. I love babies very much so I prayed to God that He will answer my prayer. Alleluia Lord that one day He answered my prayer. Then one day, my husband had a vision; he saw a lighted candle. We cannot evaluate the meaning of this vision so we told a Pastor about the vision. This Pastor seemed to have wisdom knowledge that he asked us back,"Do you pray to God for a baby?" But we never know the answer behind the vision.

After 9 months, I gave birth to a baby boy. He was the most beautiful creature that I have seen. Feeling relief and exhausted, I have a rest. Suddenly, the doctor told us that my baby has haemophilia and heart failure. After 15 hours, my husband brought me down floor to check on our baby's condition. Unfortunately, Lord has taken back what He has given us in the previous 15 hours. So I asked God, why is that He doing this to me? I really wanted a baby but He took him back. Thank goodness that I never stop believing in God's power and mighty. Now, I have two beautiful daughters, Gloria and Angela; a handsome son, future doctor, Samuel.

In retrospect, I understand why God done this to me and my husband. Haemophilia and heart failure require high cost treatment and care. My husband and I came from a very poor family and that God knows our lacking back then and that's what He was doing to lighten our burden. I really thank God for what he had done to me and my family. I'm glad that my daughters and son also believe in God in their life.

So, dear brothers and sisters in Christ, personally I think that this sharing will make us realized that God never done a mistake in our life and has never ill-treat us. He gives the best to our needs, knowing our limits and His will is the best plan to our life. To conclude, I would like to share this song (we sang this song in our TCF gathering today).

Sejauh timur dari Barat
Engkau membuang dosaku
Tiada Kau ingat lagi pelanggaranku
Jauh ke dalam tubir laut
Kau melemparkan dosaku
Tiada Kau perhitungkan kesalahanku
Betapa besar kasih pengampunan Mu Tuhan
Tak Kau pandang hina hati yang hancur
Ku berterima kasih kepadaMu ya Tuhan
Pengampunan yang Kau beri pulihkanku...


-Sejauh Timur dari Barat, MARIA SHANDI-

Second semester of degree program~It has been a while since my last post huh? Too busy that I can slightly see a part in my daily schedule that I can have time for myself. You see;

1. 7.30am - 4.00pm --> Class!
2. 4.00pm - 6.00pm --> Gardening (part of my coursework) and some day I have netball class.
3. 6.00pm - 7.30pm --> shower, dinner, whatsoever~
4. 7.30pm - 10.30pm --> Orchestra class (playing viola is such a pain if u don't get it and I feel more like a 'donkey'!)
5. 10.30pm - 12.00am --> Lots of assignment to be completed. Finished all, SLEEP IS A MUST!

I think I have become fit and yet healthier (take note that I'm not that skinny or fat) since I have to attend so many physical activity, instead of academic class. Frankly speaking, I love my schedule so far, just that I still need some times to get used to it. Feeling exhausted sometimes is good to boost up my stamina. But still I'm afraid that I may not have much time to study. This is not good!